So… Lala and Loopsy, my dear ones… You are only 4 now. At this point you still think the only difference between you and boys is that they usually have shorter hair, usually never wear tutus, and tend to stay away from the color pink. There will be many lessons to learn in the upcoming years.
I’m reading 50 Shades of Grey. I can already tell it’s going to be a good read. Not a good message or representation of a real life relationship, but entertaining, engaging, spellbinding nonetheless. Still, it inspired me to want to tell you this, to imprint it on your little 4 yr old brains so you won’t face this particular heartache, but, obviously, now’s not the time. So I put my words of wisdom here on my blog.
In the book, Christian says to Ana, “You should steer clear of me. I’m not the man for you.”
Wow, where have I heard this before? Oh, right, didn’t Edward say something to Bella like, “We shouldn’t be friends.”?
Doesn’t my beloved Bruno Mars sing, “Run away baby, before I put my spell on you. You better get away, darling, ’cause everything you’ve heard is true.”? This is the same guy who said, “You’re amazing just the way you are.” *sigh*
Bad boys, my daughters, are fun, sure, but guard your hearts.
Even I fell sway to the lure of the bad boy. My very first boyfriend began our relationship by saying something to the effect of, “I’m just going to hurt you.”
What was I thinking, you ask? Oy. We had great chemistry, but that’s not the entire story. He was nursing a broken heart/bruised ego and I thought, “I could be the one to fix him!” I had this absurd idea that my love was enough to transform him. *sigh* I don’t know. I was young and naive and easily swept away by the romance of it.
Ever since reading Wuthering Heights I’d been captivated by that dark, unattainable, tempestuous sort of soul. I was a dumb girl. I mean, didn’t Catherine end up miserable and dead? Shoulda been the first clue that bad boys are not the way to go.
Bad boys bring sex appeal, perhaps poetry or maybe music, brooding good looks, and drama all around. They captivate us, even though we know they are bad. Even now I liked Evil “Ripper” Stefan better than Good “No killing people” Stefan on the Vampire Diaries. I’d always be Team Damon otherwise. But, like Twilight and the 50 Shades books, fictional bad boys are the only bad boys that are able to be “fixed” or “saved”.
What’s more realistic is that the bad boy will be, um, bad. He’ll cause countless episodes of drama and will break your heart again and again, but will always come back because, “You’re too good for him.” Your love affair will be tumultuous and passionate, but it will be painful, and most likely, mercifully, brief. Your friends will hate him, your family will be wary of him. He will absolutely be wrong for you, but he will feel sooooo right.
Sweet daughters, the take away message from this is: If a man says he’s going to hurt you, that he’s wrong for you, BELIEVE HIM. Edward Cullen and Christian Grey only exist in the minds of female authors. Seriously.
That is all. We will now return to the regularly scheduled Mommy programming of “Please don’t pick your boogers.”